Response to raising my children "prudish"

**** PREFACE***Okay if you don't understand the title to this blog entry you need to go back and read the previous entry : Tolerance or not or you will not have a clue to what this is about.

I am full of emotion right now...bare with me through this. I can't believe more people didn't have an opinion on this matter or maybe it is just that no one reads this stuff anyway or maybe that guest speaker was right...people are too tolerant. I thought I would get lots of advice or at least an ear full, oh well, thanks Talley for your input and Heather and Jenn too. After talking to my Pastor for awhile today on what he thought he helped me figure out what to write back. The following is the email I sent this evening:
Dear - ,
Thank you for your response. I am not going to try to argue or debate religion with you because we are on two different sides of the table when it comes to that.
My concern is as a parent, like I said in my original email. As a parent I want to shield my young child's eyes from nudity and likewise material until they are at an age at which it can be explained and understood. As my children are very young they have not reached this age and as a mother I do not feel that it is fair that I cannot control what they are exposed to because it is plainly placed on the side of the road. If this artwork was in a museum or art gallery I would have the choice to take my children to see it or not to. Yet, it is publicly displayed and I have no choice in the matter if she sees it or not. As a parent, I also choose to not let my children watch tv shows that contain sexual content, vulgar language, or immoral virtues. My husband and I are working very hard to raise young girls that are modest and pure as I believe this is God's desire for them. Whereas, there is no other Catholic church in this area that is choosing to display such images for the Lent season. As you can see my concern is great and stems from mainly being a parent and wanting only the best for my children.

As a resident of Flint I am asking you to reconsider your artwork selection for the Lent banners for the sake of all the young children that pass by on a daily basis.

Thank you,
Jenn

I am not expecting massive changes or even the removal of the signs but I rest assured that I know I took a stand for what was right, I did it in a loving way, and most of all I did not show tolerance to something that did not deserve it. So my challenge is to you...what do you tolerate? What do you let go or ignore? Do you tolerate or not?

Tolerance or Not

So as a you kid we had a guest speaker at our church one time which I can't even remember his name. I don't remember everything he said but I do remember the basic idea of his message. He said that we live in a world of tolerance. I didn't totally understand what he was talking about but for some reason those words stuck with me (really I know the reason which is because God was using him to send a message). As I get older these words come to mind often and I must say I agree with Josh. We tolerate sin in all forms and fashion, homosexuality, immoral sexuality, cursing, lying, and the list could go on and on. Please don't misunderstand, I am so guilty of tolerating all these things too. I don't know how many times someone has said something disturbing and I just kept walking and didn't say anything to them or having been around people who are sexually immoral and I remain silent. The point is that as Christians we have a job to speak for what is right and not tolerate sinful nature. I don't believe that we are to judge or condemn that is God and the Holy Spirit's job but I do believe we are to speak The Truth out of love. Easier said then done. I am the last person to speak up usually and I am almost always to abrupt when I do say something even though I don't mean to be. With all of this said there has been something bothering me lately. A local church about 1.5 miles down the road from us put up some posters a week or so back out on the main road...which by the way is a major thurofare. These posters are of Adam and Eve and the Tree of Life. Adam and Eve are portrayed just how God made them... showing a full backside of nudety on Eve and a full frontal picture of Adam with a small fern leaf covering his private area. These posters artwork of historical paintings of a specific era and I have no qualms with the artist. However, these are lifesize portraits hung right were every passing eye can get an eyefull. Now, what do you say to your 4 year old when you drive by and she begins asking questions about why there are naked people on the side of the road? I am at a lost for words. This type of display is reprehensible. In a museum or art gallery it would be one thing but how are we to shield our innocent child's eyes when churches are putting things up like this.

It is very hard for a young child to wrap their mind around the explanation of Adam and Eve's nakedness when at the same time you are trying to teach them to be modest, cover up, keep their legs closed when wearing a dress. So what did I do...I decided not to tolerate it. I emailed the church. This is what I said:

I am emailing you as a concerned citizen of Flint, Texas and a fellow believer in Christ. I am the mother of two very small children, whom I am trying to raise as modest, God fearing women. I work very hard to instill strong moral values and Christ -like hearts and attitudes. Everyday is hard work but it is very rewarding. Having said this, we travel down Old Jacksonville Hwy passed your church numerous times a week. We see your signs and banners posted everyday and this is where my concern comes into play. As you have recently displayed two new banners about Lent with historical artwork of a portrait of Adam and Eve it has become a very inquisitive subject when driving by. Our young daughter is questioning why there are naked people on banners. I personally understand historical artwork and appreciate aesthetics but to the mind of a 4 year old it is very hard to explain and she does not need to be exposed to this type of material at such a young age. Her mind is delicate and fragile. I wanted you to be aware that this advertisement is detrimental to our children's eyes and brings great concern. I know that as a church leader you would want to be notified of any concern. Thank you for your time and your understanding.

This was the reply I received this morning:

Dear Ms. Carlile,

I am always open to people's comments. I appreciate that you masy feel that these posters are not to your taste.

The task of the Church is partly to instill Catholic values in the greater population of the area. a small part of that Catholic culture is the legacy of artwork which accompanies our beliefs. That tradition of artwork is generally unknown in the South. It is one of my concerns to expose the general population to the great tradition of Christian artwork, of both the East and the west. the figures of Adam and Eve as emblematic of Lent are a very old part of the Lenten time.

The general population is Christian of a rather puritanical type. This is historical fact. But I cannot simply conform to the culture here. Catholicism is not another church on Church row. We are the ancient church founded upon the Apostles, we are the mother of the churches. For that very reason, we have the obligation to be different and to challenge the puritanism of this area. Catholicism has had its own sad history of puritanism over many centuries. But we have always managed to throw it overboard and to live more fully in joy at the bodies and the intellects which God has given to mankind. Puritanism also looks askanse at intellectual avctivity and focuses only on piety. Puritanism is not a very good sign of a society, because it brings with it shame, and a belief in the total depravity of man. Catholicism does not promote licencious living or public displays of sexual depravity. But we are not ashamed of the human being who nis the glory of creation. The naked human body is appropriate in theological reflection on the fall and on Salvation. The Catholic Church is a Church of sign and symbol, of bread and wine, of oil and ashes, of touch and color. But even some of our own people here in East Texas have become infected by the prevailing culture of prudishness and picket fence stuff. I see it as part of my task here to make our catholic people more catholic and in the process, to change the culture of this small part of the South.

In evert church in medieval Europe and in latin America, the figures of Adam and Eve standing beside the Tree of Life are on the left of the main doors. they are always naked or at least hiding their nakedness. on the left stands the cross with Mary and John beside it. The bible has them naked. I have hardly used a picture that shows their body parts in any brash way. The posters are in line with modesty and with what is acceptable to most catholic and Christian people.

We will have to disagree about this matter.

As you can tell I could barely understand the big words because I am used to small words that 4 year old use...hahaha. So now I know that I must make one last stand. I can't email back right now because I have been infuriated and needed some time to cool off. I talked to my pastor and asked him for his advice which he is graciously giving me. So what do you think? Have I gone off my rocker or is it just? Let me know because I really do what to do the right thing for the Kingdom, for my children, and for my witness.

Mollie, Mollie, and more Mollie

My sweet Mollie outside the other day enjoying some good sunshine and warm weather.

Mollie loves pickles. She cracks me up because she doesn't even show a sour face but just scarfs it down.


These two pictures are of when Mollie was on breathing treatments. She is all done with those and hopefully for good but we will find out. We go back to the doctor on Tuesday. She was such a trooper through all of this stuff and I was so proud of her.



Just my sweetie and he sweet cheeks.

Bike riding

Maddie got a bike when Mollie got here and she loves it but doesn't ride it very much. The other day when it was so nice outside I got some great pictures of her being brave and trying to ride that bike. Yes, she has a helmet but it is not on so please don't judge me that I am a bad mom...I already know that.

I made another diaper cake the other day for a friend at church who is having a little boy. Maddie helped me the whole time. She is such a good little helper and always willing. I am so lucky to have someone who want to help. We made it as boyish as possible...which by the way when you don't have any boys that is a hard thing to do. We can do girly and do it well but we struggle when it comes to boy stuff. I think it turned out okay and not to fufu. Speaking of boy stuff. We have had boy birthday parties like crazy lately. We had two last week alone and another one next week. What kind of creative stuff is there for boys? Superheroes and Cars get boring after awhile...any suggestions from those mommies with boys. Our next party is for a cousin who will be 6 so definitely not a baby.

Sheet snob

We have now lived in our hose for two years and it has been a great two years. Right after we moved in we stumbled across a furniture closing sale and were able to purchase a tempurapedic bed for a great deal. We originally had a queen and our new bed was a king. Going from a queen to a king is a big deal much like upgrading from business to first class on a plane trip. There is so much more room to stretch out and if you don't even want to know there is someone else in the bed you don't have too. Basically if you want to talk to the person next to you a cell phone might be necessary. Okay well maybe not but it sure felt that way when we got it. Unfortanutely we also had to buy sheets for our new bed and a comforter and shams and pillows ect. ect. We also needed a new bed frame but that was not in the finiancal plan right away so we settled with putting it on the floor until we could get the bed frame I felt would do justice for our new bed. Well life has been great on our new bed and it has more or less become my favorite place to be in my spare time. On a limited budget we initially only purchased one set of king sheets and might I add sheets are ridiculously expensive. So when it was time to wash sheets we had to get them washed and dryed in one day to get them back on the bed. Not really a big deal but sometimes it was a hassle. Luckily, Kohl's had a great sale last spring. Buy one set get the second set free. I jumped at the chance to buy some new sheets and have the luxury of having three sets. Immediately I changed to the new set of course. You got to break them in right. So our sheet set count is up to 3 sets. 1 set from the intital bed purchase and 2 sets from the Kohl's sale....you still with me? So anyway, last summer we finally got our bed frame. It is gorgeous and I love it. Now we don't look like homeless people sleeping on the floor. Anyways, with all of that said, last week it was time to change the sheets and wash the dirty ones. Somehow or another the 2nd set of sheets had gotten dirty and so we had to put the initial set we bought two years ago on the bed. As soon as I climbed into bed it felt so wierd and uncomfortable. I never thought they felt that way before when that was all that we had. They didn't sleep good and they made me insanely hot at night. I had to put a rush on getting our other sheets clean and back on the bed. I never knew I was a sheet snob. Guess that once you have gone to the other side of sheets that is you never go back. Don't worry I will keep the old set in case their is some crazy emergency we might run into like we did last week but we will only use them as a last resort. Needless to say it only took us two years to get our bed just the way I like it, feeling and looking. Now the next thing to work on is getting some side tables. Good thing those don't have to be comfortable.

Doctor says...

We just got back from the doctor and he basically said she has a really bad chest cold. She is wheezing really bad and choking on her on drainage. So now she has a breathing machine with medicine that we have to give her three times a day. He said it would get worse before better. I feel so bad for her. She is such a sweetie through it all and her big sister is doing everything she can think of to try and make her feel better. Please pray she will get over this stuff quickly and be able to be her spunky self again.