Disney, Cat Scan, Revelation

So much has happened in the last month I hardly know where to begin. We had the opportunity to go to Florida over Halloween and go to Disney World for one day, which by the way was awesome! However, that is a whole other post in itself.

After we arrived back from or trip we received a phone call from our infectious disease doctor that he felt like we needed to go ahead and see the ENT again so that he could remove the lymph nodes. This was a surprise to us because we thought he wanted to wait a few more weeks to make that decision. Nonetheless we got into the ENT a few days later as a priority appointment. After a good examination and a lot of questions the dr. told us he felt it necessary to remove them. However, he was concerned that there could be permanent paralysis to her lower lip as a result of surgery. He therefore wanted us to get a cat scan done so that he would have enough information to prepare for the surgery. I was floored that this was even a risk but thankful that he wasn't just willing to cut her open. The dr. also said that he had two doctor friends at Children's hospital in Dallas that he was going to review her case with and seek their opinions as well. I loved that idea! So today we had the cat scan. Needless to say I have been pretty nervous about the whole thing because they would be using anesthsia so that she would be still and because she would have to have and IV. There were a few hiccups during the day and most of us ended up with throw up on us but I must admit it went really well. I know that sounds crazy, but God had His hand completely on us. My 2 year old laid in a hospital bed for an hour and a half with an IV in her hand. She cried a little but remained still for the majority of the time. She allowed BP cuffs, thermometers, poking, and even the removal of her IV without hardly putting up a fight. I was so proud of her and knew that God was rocking us in His lap during the entire day. We won't know the results for several days but next week we should find out when the surgery will be to remove these lymph nodes.

I can't end this update like this because I would be leaving out the most vital information. Over the last few months all of these health issues have been a heavy burden and a lot to deal with. After so many internal conversations, questions, and tears I still felt completely overwhelmed. As a parent you do anything in your power to take care of your children and seeing them suffer and go through so much is difficult to say the least. A little over a week ago before Mollie's ENT appointment our Sunday school class prayed over her. It was so emotional and so powerful to me. I felt God's presence and moving in my heart. That day was also the kick off to our revival. Being able to experience God in a different way was something I won't forget. I finally realized I was still trying to handle all of this myself. God was telling me I was placing my children first instead of putting him first. I am not saying that God was punishing me because I don't believe that is true but I am saying I realized I had lost sight of what I needed to be placing my love in first and making my first priority. It happened so easily and I am ashamed but I see that now. I laid my baby at Jesus feet and totally gave it to Him. I felt peace and reassurance right away and even though there are things that are scarey I know I have the Creator with me. He loves her more than I do and I find so much peace knowing that. I believe that he provides everything and that I don't have to endure this alone but that He will develop in me greater Faith and character, and my prayer is that Mollie herself will see that faith one day and love the Lord back. I have the opportunity to continue to be His light and reflection during this time. So all praise goes to God for the blessings he poured on us today and the ones he continues to rain down.